Because I am an idiot, I made a huge mistake in my last entry. I wrote that the song was called "Laura Lament." It's not; it's "Laura Laurent." Stupid me.

Now, I must go on an overanalytical Bright Eyes tangent. Namely? Conor Oberst has terrible grammar. I don't mind the occasional "ain't" or a double negative, and I know that I'm guilty of switching tenses like crazy. I allow a few made-up words from time to time. Oberst goes beyond that, though. When the poorness of the grammar becomes a distraction from the songs, there are serious problems.

In the annoyingly-titled "You Will. You? Will. You? Will. You? Will.," he uses the word "reoccurring." Sorry, dude, but it's "recurring."

Conor also seems to have difficulty telling "lie" and "lay" apart from one another. One wouldn't think that this would come up very often, but Bright Eyes' songs use the terms all the freakin' time, and almost never correctly.

In "Laura Laurent," he ought to say that her thoughts "have always lain" close to his. "Have laid" is an perfect example of incorrect conjugation; the word "laid" will never be used without a direct object.

In "Amy in the White Coat," he uses the line "You lay so low in the grass." I can allow that if I assume that he's using the past tense of "lie." If he's using it in present tense, it's incorrect, and, due to the present tense of the rest of the lyrics in that verse, I'm pretty sure he's screwing it up again.

Worst of all, though, is the song "Nothing Gets Crossed Out." First he observes, "All I do is just lay in bed." I don't like the unnecessary "just," but I can allow it because of the meter of the song. However, since it's present tense, he needs "lie in bed." Secondly, he announces, "The grass grew high; I laid down." "Laid" is not the past tense of recline, Conor. That would be "lay." Next, we have the lyric "I've been laying so low." No, no, no, you've been "lying." Lastly, he cries out, "Don't wanna lay here no more." If it were just the double negative, I'd let it slip in the interest of artistic license. But come on, Oberst. You "don't wanna lie here." "Lay" is a transitive verb. Please, sir, learn the rules.

All those flaws are off the top of my head, and I'm sure I could find more. Fortunately for you, I don't feel like doing so. You may begin referring to me as the Grammar Bitch. Anybody think I'm hypocritical (and hypercritical)? I agree with you. I admit to being an uber-analytical hypocrite. In fact, I'm your worst nightmare. I'm the reoccurring kind.